No Es Sobre Mi // It’s Not About Me
There is something that has transformed inside me over the past couple months that I feel it’s my job to share with everyone I know. Maybe you already tell yourself the same thing twenty times a day like me. Perhaps you have heard this concept before and you didn’t realize the power that it actually holds, so you forgot about it. This could even be a new concept for you, which, in that case, you might just want nothing to do with it. It’s a paradigm shift, a slight adjusting of the lens with which we view the world. Nothing is actually different, just clearer. When the focus is sharp, you UNDERSTAND what you’re seeing. The blurry surroundings may even become a part of the focal point:
Nothing you do is really FOR you, BECAUSE of you, or ABOUT you. But what about eating healthy and exercising (trying to)? That’s for my body. Or the house that was built for Lillian Jesusita’s family- we did that. My goals and plans for my future, those are mine! Well, those are half sort of right but also half very wrong. Our health and our success and our ambitions aren’t ours, because they’re not for us. They aren’t because of us because we didn’t have the means to do it on our own. And they’re certainly not about us. It’s all for, because, and about the One who created us and put us in the position do it all in the first place. I don’t know about you, but I saw a lot of God’s ambition over the six-week internship. I had no right to be mixing cement and laying block on a woman’s house, but there I was. Our group of interns hardly spoke Spanish, but there sat our family and one of our foremen drying their falling tears on our last day at the thought of distance soon pulling apart our bond that surpassed all language barriers. There is absolutely NO way we can even try to take credit for the chain of events that brought Lillian a healthy newborn baby- birthed a month early, on a rainy day in a hospital an hour away, immediately post-baby shower, then facing critical health conditions for 5 days before becoming miraculously healed a day later. “It’s not about me” makes me stop believing in coincidence. It makes me want to get uncomfortable and struggle my way through an hour-long conversation in a language I’m not comfortable speaking so that a coffee barista can share her dreams with someone who cares. It convicts me to not limit what our God might do or who he might put in my path next.
Since coming back to the States, nothing exactly earth-shattering has happened in my day-to-day life. But I’m realizing that God still works just the same in my life through the daily grind just as he does in Guatemala. I’m just used to always giving myself the credit for the things that happen here in Tallahassee, FL. But here’s to taking faith out of the box of what’s convenient and letting it be a light that reflects off everything I do. Not easy, uncomfortable, but purposeful and so exciting.
Thank you to my intern friends for driving this concept into my heart! Shout out to Carrie, because I think you said it first!!
Leigh, Maddy, Jennifer, Shea, Katie, Kai, Betty, Tori, Carrie, Kloe, and Jenn … your friendship is exactly what I didn’t know I needed. Thank you for sharing wisdom, laughs, and snacks with me <3
Thanks for saying “yes” to me, Genia. Your unconditional support is way, way too cool 🙂
Don Pedro – thank you for being the coolest Guatemalan grandfather, and for learning to hand me the aux cord.
Hilda, gracias por su apoyo, por ser nuestra Superwoman, y simplemente por entenderme y enseñarme que no tengo que tener miedo!
Carlos y Roberto … Ütz Awäch!! Ahahaha! Gracias por todo, amigos.
All my love,
2018 Para Servir Intern